This is a topic that I have covered before, however that said, it is something that has really come to the forefront in my life lately. The other fear that I seem to constantly battle with is the fear of success.
Let’s look at this in a logical and unemotional manner.
Firstly – the fear of failure is a very normal emotion. I promise you, you are not alone. Everyone has, at some time or another had this fear. It’s how you deal with it that is important.
One of the ways to deal with the fear of failure, is to set yourself reasonable and effective goals. Remember though that you need to keep your goals as bite sized chunks, so that they are easily attainable.
Here’s the thing – “We can only have one thought at a time” says Robin S. Sharma – the trick is to have the right thought.
I am currently reading “The Monk Who Sold his Ferrari” by Robin S Sharma and some of the advice that I have seen there, not only resonated with me – it blew me out of the water. You see the whole book, (and I haven’t finished reading it yet) is around the fact that our minds control our thoughts and we should control our minds. Our thoughts actually bring about our fears or failures or indeed, our successes and pretty much anything that we wish to achieve.
In this wonderful story the Sage (or teacher) says that even one negative thought is poisonous to us as individuals and that we, by controlling our minds and our thoughts’ can change these ‘negative’ thoughts into ‘positive’ thoughts that will serve us. The reader is given exercises in visualization of the positive kind. These exercises start at a few minutes a day and they progress from there. There is also a section on ‘what to do’ when you have a negative thought. It really is a wonderful book and one that I would really recommend to everyone.
Of course, like everything else in life, it is only in the repetitive actions of the individual, that the solution will take place – it’s not an instantaneous happening, but rather a gradual reformation, so don’t think that you can do the exercise once and then everything in your life is solved. It won’t be, you have to repeat the exercise on a daily basis and you have to continue it for life.
Secondly, let’s have a look at the fear of success. This is the one that bites me in the rear end on a regular basis. I have spent all my life dreaming about my goals and when they finally arrive, I go into a kind of reverse action and my brain is flooded with thoughts of “I can’t do this because . . . “ or “I don’t deserve . . . .”! Actually yes I do deserve – I have put in the work, I have sweated the blood and cried the tears and the reward is mine to enjoy.
Again, it is about controlling your thoughts and turning positive thoughts into successful actions. Remember that a thought without any action is just that – a thought. The thought needs an action in order for anything to happen.
The bottom line of course, is that it is up to you – they are your thoughts and you are the only person that can control them.