Today’s quote comes from an anonymous person who says “Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday.”
Ooh, ooh, ooh that’s me! My hand should be up first in the class for this one! The worse thing about it though is that it drives me nuts! Fortunately I do recognize the fact that I am a work in progress, so I do know that I am constantly trying to work on it and one day, I’m sure I’ll actually ‘crack the code’ and put it behind me – it’s such a useless waste of energy!
The thing for me though is that I have a very active brain. So when I am presented with something or if I have done something that I know is going to have a nasty consequence or even entered into an argument with someone, it all spins around inside of my head and often it spins around hard and long and fast enough to give me a headache!
I take a careful look at what was said and then look at the various consequences that could arise, then I take a careful look at what wasn’t said and then look at the various consequences that could arise, then I look at the various possibilities of what could have been said and then should have been said and by now I am sure you have a very clear picture in your own head of what is happening in mine – or perhaps not! Pretty soon I’m all riled up and worked up. My blood pressure is through the roof, I am angry all over again and literally quite cranky with the world in general.
Here’s the thing though, ultimately I cannot change what has already been done and whatever the consequences, I will have to accept them. No amount of playing anything over and over in my head, in all the different scenarios and all the different consequences is going to change in any way what was done or said. The only thing that can change is the way that I choose to look at it or accept that what is done is done.
Usually I am left exhausted from lack of sleep. Wound up tighter than an elastic band and generally speaking not fit for human consumption for at least a few days. Angry, dejected and alone – a punishment of my own making (it’s really not a good idea for me to be around people as I irritate myself) I might add, I usually feel beaten up and thrown away. I am completely drained!
Ironically, the reality of the actual consequence usually has far less impact than the one I’ve conjured up in my mind. How’s that for a mind *&^+?
The bottom line, what have I actually achieved at the end of the day – well not much on the positive side, but I sure as hell have made a real dent in the negative aspect. I wasted precious time, used oodles of energy that could have been put to much better use. Beaten myself senseless, irritated myself into a coma and all for something that is a perception that is inside of me and that more often than not, no-one else on the planet will ever even know about.
Talk about worrying over nothing – I have to be the worlds champion at this. What about you? Do you do silly stuff like this too? If so, are you also trying to stop?