I attended a workshop a while ago that was facilitated by Iain Johnston of Iain Johnston Consulting (www.ijc.co.za ) . What an interesting time I had and I also got some great tips on all sorts of things from him too.
One of these tips was something along the lines of – when engaged in dialogue with someone, wait for 5 seconds after they have finished talking before you respond with your own comments.
There are several reasons for this, but one of the most important ones is that the other person really feels that, not have you heard everything that they have said, but that you are also really thoughtfully considering what they have said before you respond. It’s like you are weighing up their words carefully.
It also makes them feel that you have taken a real interest in what they have to say rather than just waiting for them to pause for a breath before you jump right in with whatever you have to say.
In reality, what it actually does do, is give you a chance to formulate an intelligent response to what has just been said rather than you making a complete toss of yourself by firing off a response before you have even heard the end of the sentence.
I know that I am very guilty of this and always seem to be in a hurry to have my say. Truth be told though, the other person also has the right to be heard and probably also has the same desire as I do, to be heard.
Jumping right off the mark like that may well mean that I get to ‘say my say’ really quickly, but it will not guarantee that my say is actually heard or even that if it is heard that it is understood and quite frankly what is the point of me having my say if it is not heard or understood.
So a huge big thank you to Iain for making me aware of this and in my new found awareness, my understanding of the fact that by slowing down and pausing before I jump right in, I will be Networking far more effectively.
By Networking more effectively, I will be building better and stronger relationships and better and stronger relationships will result in more and more sustainable business coming my way.
Bottom line, slow down – smell the roses, drink and savour the coffee. Life was not meant to be lived at break neck speed.